Julie's Family Blog: Slow Down Time or Time to Slow Down

I can't believe that it's been 10 days since we got home from vacation... it actually feels like a couple of months have went by. I've figured out that I'm tired of this pace. Tired enough to slow down. I want to be able to see Eliot during his last year of high school and I can't do that if I'm at church when he's home. I want Elise to be able to have her friends over for Bible Study and I can't do that if the only nights I have available are nights when she has violin lessons. I want to be able to go watch my nephews play ball and I can't do that if I'm at church every Saturday. I want to go out for coffee with my husband and I can't do that if it's 45 minutes worth of driving round trip to meet him. I want to be able to answer a phone call from Adrienne and say, "Sure. I'll pick you up in a little bit." So, I decided that I am the only one who can change. This week I resigned from two areas that I am passionate about and that between the two of them, take up almost every Saturday of the month and one night a week. Was it an easy decision? No. Was everyone happy with my decision? No. Was it worth it? Yes. It was worth it just to see the two kids and the husband who I could tell were a little surprised and very happy that I did it. And the feeling of extra space that I sense coming is priceless.

I've been trying to put my finger on what exactly led me to this decision. I know it has a lot to do with the feeling of "barely keeping it together". It's hard to explain, but for most of my day I walk around in this trance that includes an agenda of every minute of the day, as well as this monologue in my head that reminds me "it's all going to be ok so don't stress out". I'm pretty sure that's unhealthy. I've also been reading, "Thrive" by Arianna Huffington. We are going to be reading it as a staff at church so I thought I would get a head start on it. Ms. Huffington has some amazing, radical ideas... such as get 30 minutes more sleep each day; stop and meditate or pray in the middle of each day; take a vacation from email and social media. Things that really don't sound that hard to implement, and make a great deal of sense. What doesn't make sense is coming home from vacation and feeling like there aren't enough minutes in the day to accomplish anything well. That is what led to the decision to cut back, to slow down, to say no. I think I have been setting myself (and my kids, Scott, our home) up to fail instead of thrive!

So what have we done in the last 10 days?

Well, we bought a new car...